We all experience ups and downs in our faithfulness and devotion. For me, I really want to do the right thing; but, as it turns out, I am a weak vessel. I need to ask for help continually and repent continually. One weekend a few months ago, I was feeling sheepish about my efforts to be a disciple. I felt a yearning in my heart to lay aside the preoccupations that so easily distract me and truly be close to my Savior, Jesus Christ. I wanted to feel Jesus’ love.
Feeling Jesus’ Love
I wondered for the billionth time if I was significant enough to Christ that He would care that I felt that way. These were the emotions swirling through my heart and mind as I entered the chapel that Sunday. As we prepared for and received the Sacrament a feeling of peace filled all the doubtful spaces in my heart. I felt loved.
A few weeks later a scripture came clearly and suddenly to mind in direct response to the thoughts I’d been having earlier.
1 John 4:19
We love Him, because He first loved us.
The yearning I felt to be closer to Christ did not originate with me, Christ felt that way first. My yearning evidences His yearning. Our relationship with Him does matter a great deal to Him. He understands our preoccupations and mortal weaknesses more fully than anyone, offers us a way to lay them aside, and cheers for any progression (however small it seems) we may make. He loves us. And I love Him.